Exactly as it is now

Sorry for my long absence from this space. It has been a whirlwind couple of weeks, with sickness, making, celebrating, and living. I'll get to more of that in the coming days. But for today, I have something different I want to share.


I was talking to my wise friend Meghan today, and she made this comment: "This moment will never be exactly as it is now." So true. There's so much to hold onto in these days with our small ones. There is an art to this -- to recognizing that every moment, whether happy or sad or angry or just ordinary, is magical in its uniqueness. These moments that make up our lives come and go -- they're so fleeting. And somehow a few of them will stand out in the course of a life, memories that never fade. What would it be like if every moment was like that? Fully lived, remembered, treasured?


These pictures are from today's very ordinary afternoon. My older two children were outside playing in the snow, and I was trying to get Fiona down for her nap. I looked at her and thought about how she will never again be as she was in that moment: exactly that chubby, exactly that pink, exactly that combination of curious, sleepy, content, busy. She will never be exactly 10 months and 4 days, ever again.


I made a choice at that moment, to love it, just as it was. Not to get sentimental and bittersweet about it, but to just live it. Fiona and Mama, this afternoon, laying down for a nap.


Just exactly as we were.