Five years old!

james five1

{please excuse the breakfast crumbs! ack!}

It's funny about time. Sometimes, you can see how you got from one point to another and it makes perfect sense -- I think about Elisabeth turning nine this spring, and even though that seems so "big", and even though, in some ways, I can hardly believe it, at the same time, nine years seems about right. It really feels like it's been that long. But sometimes, the passing of time doesn't seem to make any sense at all. When I think back to that snowy Sunday morning five years ago, when I awoke and had a baby in my arms just an hour later, I can't believe it's been a full five years. Five!

candles

So, my little guy is five today. Ages three and four were challenging for him. He's a sensitive little soul who feels things so acutely, and it sometimes leads to misunderstandings (or worse) between him and the people around him. I'll admit to more than a few moments of frustration where I have asked "Why? Why me? Why is he so challenging? How are we supposed to get through this?" And those moments are often followed by moments of grace, in which I realize that I am the exact mother he needs, as hard as that might be sometimes.

james five17

james five10

But he is such a smart, loving, wonderful little boy, too. He fills our lives with fun, creativity, and joy. His curiosity and zeal are so inspiring, as are his honesty and vulnerability, too.

james five20

As I think any parent of a challenging child would say, I will gladly accept the storminess with the sunshine. I do hope that things are easier for him as he enters this year of Five. But no matter what, he is such a beautiful part of my life, I cannot imagine a world without him, challenges and all.

a whole hand full of years!

I'm brimming with love for my sweet boy. Happy birthday, Jamesy!